What if your morale and your desire were linked to a fragile balance... That of your mental health? Depression, stress or anxiety, these states of mind do not only darken your days: they can also impact your libido and lead to the appearance of sexual disorders. This subject, often taboo, nevertheless concerns many people. How to break this vicious circle to find serenity and fulfillment in your (intimate) life? We lift the veil in this article. And we give you all the keys to reconnect with yourself and your partner.
Why does depression sometimes mean loss of libido?
The links between mental health and low libido are complex and multifaceted. Whether we are talking about depression, anxiety or depression, the repercussions on sex life are generally significant. We explain why.
The biological mechanisms involved
You may not know this, but mental health is primarily based on a delicate balance of biological mechanisms that have many impacts on our bodies and emotions. For example, some mental disorders can cause significant chemical and hormonal imbalances.
For example, cortisol (the stress hormone) plays a central role in our body. However, as soon as we are subject to anxiety disorders or prolonged stress, the body produces it in excess. Because it focuses on stress management and neglects other functions, particularly those related to pleasure or reproduction. The key, you guessed it: it is a lack of libido almost guaranteed.
Also, some neurotransmitters, such as serotonin and dopamine (which regulate mood and feelings of pleasure), can sometimes be unbalanced. When our dopamine levels decrease (which often happens during anxiety or depressive disorders), our general motivation takes a hit. And especially that linked to intimacy. Same phenomenon with dopamine which, in insufficient quantity, can make sexual relations less attractive.
Mental load and its psychological impact
We should also not underestimate the powerful link between sexual disorders and the mental load, often invisible, but omnipresent. This burden, linked to the management of domestic and family tasks, weighs particularly heavily on women. Yes, they are used to juggling professional, personal and parental responsibilities. However, accumulating all these obligations ends up causing mental and physical exhaustion. With that, clearly: little room for relaxation or sexual desire!
Because when the brain is overloaded with an endless to-do list, it is difficult to focus on one's own well-being or intimacy. Stress due to the mental load can become almost permanent - it then leads to a drop in libido. Or even a total lack of desire, which can lead to more significant sexual problems. In short, it is a vicious circle that is sometimes difficult to escape.
You've just given birth and you're feeling a little depressed? Nothing out of the ordinary. We'll explain why in our article on the baby blues !
The impact of antidepressants on libido
The impact of antidepressants on libido is also well-known. Although they are essential for treating psychological disorders such as depression, they can also have significant side effects on sexuality. Why? Because the drug treatment often prescribed, SSRIs (= selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors), is also known to impact sexual function by:
- reducing intimate desire;
- prolonging the time to orgasm;
- leading to erectile difficulties.
The antidepressants/libido link still doesn't seem clear to you? Let's go further in our explanations. These side effects are due to the direct action of drugs on our neurotransmitters. If they increase the level of serotonin (which stabilizes mood), they can also cause a drop in dopamine, a key hormone in pleasure and motivation. And, in particular, in the sexual sphere.
Note that this loss of libido often adds a form of additional difficulty in a context already marked by weakened mental health. And, consequently, it can sometimes prove very difficult to live with.
A spiral that affects the couple
Finally, be aware that the impact of compromised mental health (or too much mental workload) is not limited to the individual... It can also affect the couple's relationship. Thus, going through a period of anxiety, depression or other psychological disorders can lead to a decrease in sexual relations between two partners. The person suffering from sexual disorders may be overwhelmed by the guilt of not "meeting expectations" and have difficulty sharing their feelings. While the other may, in turn, find themselves in a state of incomprehension. And therefore, feel rejected.
A current issue in France
The mental health of the French has clearly deteriorated in recent years. With significant consequences on birth rates and sexuality.
Deteriorating mental health
The report published by Vie publique is unequivocal: in 2021, 20.8% of young people aged 18-24 were affected by depression. Compared to only 11.7% in 2017. They are also less likely than their elders to take care of their mental health. Or to think that there are good solutions for treating depression or anxiety.
According to another study conducted by Ifop in October 2023, 77% of French people who encountered financial problems suffered:
- of intense stress;
- of anxiety;
- or nervousness.
The survey also revealed that 32% of people facing money problems reported, at the same time, sexual problems and a drop in libido.
Correlation with declining birth rate
Another alarming indicator: the decline in the birth rate. Yes, in 2023, we conceived fewer babies! Vie publique reports that the number of births fell to around 677,800, a decrease of 6.6% compared to 2022. This is the lowest number of births since the baby boom of the 60s and 70s.
This drop can be explained by several factors… Including the context of stress and instability in the country which, inevitably, influences the parental choices of the French. Because the anxiety linked to increasingly difficult living conditions (precariousness, cost of education) can clearly slow down more than one person's desire to have children.
Libido also plays an indirect but important role in this equation. Because a decline in sexual performance and sexual satisfaction among French people means a lower chance of conceiving. And, consequently, fewer babies are born.
How to find your joy of life and your libido again?
Good news: it is possible to take action to regain emotional and sexual balance. Since depression and libido are closely linked… Solutions for one often help improve the other!
Adopt a healthy lifestyle
So, how can you increase your libido and rediscover your zest for life? Starting with taking care of your lifestyle. Because yes, your lifestyle plays a fundamental role in your mental and sexual health. And, as surprising as it may seem, boosting your morale, your libido and rediscovering enjoyable sex... can be done through your plate!
Eat a balanced diet, rich in nutrients such as:
- omega-3;
- B vitamins;
- antioxidants.
Why? Because they promote healthy brain function and improve mood. You can find them in:
- nuts;
- oily fish;
- or even dark chocolate…
Which are also known for their positive effects on sexual desire. All good!
At the same time, try to do some sport. Good physical activity stimulates the production of endorphins, the feel-good hormones. These help reduce stress and increase energy levels. And therefore, your libido.
The last cornerstone of good sexual satisfaction: sleep! Yes, in addition to being a mood booster, a quality sleep regulates the levels of hormones involved in intimate desire, such as testosterone.
Looking for a boost to regain energy after giving birth? Our postpartum food supplements will catch your eye!
Reconnecting with the couple's intimacy
Depression can sometimes be isolating, we understand that. But don't forget this: the couple can also be a space for mutual support. Thus, limiting the worsening of sexual disorders also involves finding a bond with your partner. So, share your feelings, your frustrations and your expectations. Without taboos. Because these exchanges can not only strengthen your emotional bond... But also break the vicious circle of emotional isolation.
Try doing activities together: massage, walking in the forest, yoga… Why not cook together? This could revive your bond and help you find emotional balance. These shared moments have a positive impact on mood. And, by extension, on libido and sexual function.
Get support from professionals
Of course, if you've already tried all of this or you really feel stuck, don't hesitate to consult a health professional. A psychologist or sexologist can help you identify the root causes of your low libido. Whether they are emotional, hormonal or relational. You can also take your partner to couples therapy to work on your communication and intimacy. In short, don't stay alone!
Fighting depression and low libido is first and foremost about understanding their close connection. The solutions involve a healthy lifestyle, professional support and working on communication within the couple. Every small step counts to find balance in the long term. So, don't forget: the road may be long, but it is accessible and the benefits are immense.